Take care of you!

As a cancer survivor everything seems to revolve around the cancer.  Your schedule is mandated by doctor appointments.  Every day is uncertain if you feel well or not and have limitations.  It's irritating I won't lie.  There are times when you feel dictated by this disease and it's irritating.  I for one feel the need to rebel when I feel my disease is taking over my life.  This may sound a little immature but it's true.  I don't do anything too crazy, just impulsive trip to an amusement park or some other outing in a big public setting. This is a big deal, because as a current patient undergoing treatment your immune system is more compromised and the doctors like to make you paranoid about getting sick from a common cold turning into pneumonia! God forbid someone sneeze or cough near me I flinch.  It's crazy. 
Life alone is busy and as a mom it's busier.  Work, house, kids, bills, family, friends and disease.  It's a handful.  We need to remember while we are taking care of everything, and everyone else we need to care for us too.  That means taking a nap, getting nails done, not because you need to but because you want to.  Relax.  Yes you deserve it, you need it!  It's healthy.  Get a massage, facial, relax in a pool or hot tub, sit outside in the sun and read a book. You don't need to be rich or a Real Housewife to take some time to pamper yourself.  It is totally possible to pamper on a budget.  Bubble bath is usually $5, you can do an at home facial for $2.99+, a manicure is as low as $15, or you could spend more and go to a spa. Don't neglect your own wellbeing. 
My sister is so crazy busy with her girls, her church, her husband's business and her huge family and friends.  I used to make her a bubble bath and set the timer for an hour and basically lock her in the bathroom and force her to relax.  Now that she has Chron's disease she hasn't slowed down at all and she is constantly in an out of the hospital with flareups.  If she doesn't slow down and take this disease seriously it can turn into colon cancer.  Now that we are older and live further apart and I have my own family I can't do that forced relaxation for her anymore, and I can tell her health is suffering for it.  She has the ability and finances to pamper herself, and she does care for herself, she gets her nails and hair done, but is in such a rush and usually multi-tasking when she does it that she doesn't get to unplug and enjoy it, these appointments are just a task on her schedule nothing to sit back and enjoy.  She looks amazing but it takes a toll on her health.  You can have it all!  You can have balance in your life.  You just have to take it to heart and do it. You deserve it, we all do.

Remember it is not selfish to care for yourself, it is self care!

Cancer is not the boss of me.: Importance of Nutritional Supplements in battling ...

Cancer is not the boss of me.: Importance of Nutritional Supplements in battling ...: When taken correctly, vitamins, herbal supplements and natural remedies are very beneficial to one's health, especially when so many ...

Cancer and fatigue

As a cancer survivor myself I can tell you that the fatigue associated with treatments and after treatments is no joke!  Fatigue can sneak up on you and knock you off your feet!  Other times you could feel great to start and 1/2 way through doing something physical you feel exhausted.  There are some days I feel like I can sleep on and off all day.  Why does this happen?

Well there are medical, physical and emotional causes of this fatigue.

Medical causes should of course be gone over with your treatment team of doctors.  Medical causes could be anemia (low red blood cell count), infection, dehydration, electrolyte imbalance, malnutrition, medication side effects.  You should always be honest with your medical team and inform your oncologist or nurse if you experience this.

Physical causes of cancer related fatigue are the obvious over-doing it, pushing yourself, normal mom duties, but can be organ dysfunction, deconditioning (lack of physical exercise) due to bed rest, inflammation from treatments or medication.  Inflammation is a big issue for proper health and maintaining remission of disease.  Inflammation is a beast and I will go into that issue further in a future blog post.

Emotional fatigue can feel like you are tired to your bones.  Emotional fatigue can be caused by the obvious: stress, depression, fear of reoccurrence, fear of death, brain fog from chemo or radiation.  A cancer patient is flooded with what feels like a ton of emotions and thoughts, fears when we are diagnosed, hearing about treatment plans, surgeries and trying to cope or learn how to live after treatment.  Not to mention the stress we feel about the change in life and finances that are associated with it.

The general public doesn't seem to understand that fatigue is not a joke, it's not an excuse.  For a cancer patient or survivor it never goes away.  I have been dealing with cancer since 2011 and even now I find myself exhausted over seemingly simple exercises that didn't exhaust me before.  This change is frustrating. I still feel somewhat "young" but my body acts "old".  I spent the day at Disneyland with my family and the next day I was so tired I spent the day binge watching T.V. and napping.

As hard as it is to get used to, cancer fatigue needs to be taken seriously and you have to give yourself permission to rest, take it easy, nap.  Your body needs it, your health needs it.  Listen to your body when you need to rest, then sit back, get comfy and go for it.

Follow me on Facebook @compassionatehealthandwellness

Don't let cancer be the boss of you!

Ok you may have cancer, but does cancer have you?  There is a big difference in how you think about this, and it is very true when the doctor's say that positive thinking is a powerful tool.  I will be the first person to tell you cancer effing sucks!  Dealing with cancer is not for the weak, it's hard, it's awful, it hurts, you feel sick, no one wants it.  But here's the thing my body may have cancer, meaning it is in fact inside me, or has done damage to my body.  I have it, it doesn't have me.  I am the one in control, not the cancer.  Yes cancer has limited my mobility and energy and all that BUT it doesn't stop me.  I might take it easy or it might make me take a pause on some things but overall I am not stopped, and it doesn't control me. 

How can you stop cancer from bossing you around?  I'm glad you asked.

1) Realize that you are in fact in control.  Who is calling the doctor?  The cancer?  No.  You are.
Who is choosing the medical treatments to fight this disease the cancer?  No.  You are.
Who is putting food in your mouth?  You Are!
You are in control.  So you tell the cancer inside you to back the Eff off and die.  It is a little bitch that has got to go!  You are in control not the cancer and you need to say it.  Say it every day in your head, out loud, in the car, in the shower, whenever and wherever you need to, to remind yourself and the cancer that you are in control.

2) Focus on foods that boost your natural body immune system, take vitamin supplements that target your specific cancer or support the immune system in general.  Take the time to learn if your cancer has any hormone connection and then stay away from hormone rich foods and supplements. (I.E. estrogen and soy products for ovarian or breast cancers)

3) Enjoy life.  You woke up today right?  Enjoy it, don't let cancer rob of you of a beautiful day.  There is ALWAYS something to enjoy or be thankful for.  You just need to find it.

4)  Take control of your medical care.  You have to be your own advocate or have someone close to you advocate for you.  Doctor's are overworked and overwhelmed and can't always give every patient 100%, so do your own research, ask questions, look into non-traditional treatments, herbal, Eastern, etc.

5) Spiritual.  Take time to feed your soul.  Our emotions are tied to our body and greatly affect our healing.  Find ways to feed your soul, a nature walk, sitting by the duck pond in the park, meditation, yoga, prayer, church, animal therapy, painting, watching the sunset.  Balance isn't myth, it is important, and more importantly it is healthy.


Next time you say, "I have cancer."  I want you to say, "I have cancer... but it doesn't have me!"

Dig deep and find that stubborn 2year old inside of you who threw a tantrum on the floor and use her to remind the cancer of who is really in control of you!  You are!

Getting your sexy groove back after/during cancer

It's important as adults that we feel vibrant and sexy, especially as we start to age.  For me, when I lost my right breast to cancer I didn't feel less than a woman.  Sex and feeling sexy was the furthest thing from my mind.  However, as a married woman I was worried my husband wouldn't find me desirable and sexy to him.  After all my 4 year old son already said I looked like a boy with my head buzzed from the chemo, I had one breast and scars all over.  I felt like shit so I must have looked like shit too!  Well I did put make-up on every day and tried to be "cute". 

I was determined not to give in to the ugliness of cancer if I could help it.  So I bought fun earrings, wore my make-up, got a great red lipstick, painted my nails and just tried to look as "normal" as I could not only for my children's sake as they were little but for myself as well.  You often hear that if you look good you feel good, there is even a cancer charity named that.  There is truth in that statement, I have experienced it in cancer, and other illnesses or injury.  Your sexy worth should not be defined by the hair on your head, or lack thereof.  Bald can be beautiful!  For both men and women.  Bruce Willis looks great!  Amber Rose is rocking it!  So are many of my fellow cancer friends.  Gorgeous!

Pin-ups for Cancer is a wonderful group I belong to here in California and they host a pin-up photo shoot for survivors and their families or caregivers and it's a blast!  So many women are treated to being pampered with hair and make-up being done by professionals and getting dressed up and having fun.  For many this is the first time in months that they have felt sexy and it is beautiful to see these women re-discover their beauty. 

If you are lucky enough to have a spouse that is standing by you while you go through hell of cancer treatments I can assure you that they still see you as you were on your wedding day.  Love and sexual appeal is not 100% visual.  It is spiritual, emotional and a little laughter can go a Long way!  I am often asked why I didn't have a nipple reconstructed or tattooed on my reconstructed breast.  I always answer that I wanted to have more fun surprising my husband with a sticker on it instead.  From yellow happy face emoji stickers to scratch-n-sniff stickers we have had some fun with it.  I love it, and I am so glad I made the choice I did.

My advice to you is to get your sexy back.  Good song by Justin Timberlake, and good advice.  It doesn't matter if you are married or not, you deserve to feel desirable and sexy.  Buy a gorgeous pair of lacy panties, or a sexy pair of high heels, a bold lipstick or hey some scratch-n-sniff stickers and have fun with it.

What do you do when a friend is diagnosed?

Not knowing what to say when you hear that a friend or family member has been diagnosed with cancer is a common feeling, even to the most gifted of speakers.  A cancer diagnosis is devastating, there is no getting around it, and for a survivor to have it return and hear those words for a 2nd or 3rd time, "you have cancer" for me it was more devastating than the first time.

Recently I have seen posts on Facebook of my fellow breast cancer sisters posting that their cancer has now metastasized labeling them stage IV or incurable because now the original space infected by cancer has now moved.  Although there is a lot of research into breast cancer there is not a lot (or enough) research into metastatic cancer.

A cancer patient and their family live daily with the fear of cancer returning.  When it does it is heart breaking.  As a survivor myself I feel like I don't know what to say to my friend who now has to go through chemo all over again, lose her hair all over again, feel like crap all over again.  All in the fight to live to see her grandkids born. 

What do you say to a friend or family member who is diagnosed with cancer???? Whether it is the 1st, 2nd or 12th time they are diagnosed you can always say, "I love you, and I am here for you, whatever you need.  Even just to hold your hand or sit with you."

#stageIVneedsmore  #cancersucks #cancercutie #Iamthefaceofstage4

BHT and why you should avoid it

In researching information on cancer prevention for my own fight against breast cancer I tend to come across latest fads and info about the newest links to cancers, theories, and products that are carcinogens.  Here in the U.S. it is astounding how many products and foods that are allowed in our country for consumption to the American people. 
I used to feel safer buying American products because I naively thought our FDA watched over the safety of the products and foods and that we held things to a higher standard than other countries. 
What a joke. 
I am not a big conspiracy theorist, or anti-American however I do believe that the powers that be and big companies are too blinded by greed of the almighty dollar that they lie to the American public and allow harmful products to be consumed in a snowball effect that ends up lining the pockets of big pharma.  
BHT and BHA are one such item. BHT or butyl hydroxytoluene and butylated hydroxyanisole (BHA) is a fat soluble synthetic compound which is commonly used to preserve foods and cosmetics to slow down the autoxidation rate of ingredients in a product that can cause changes in the taste or color.
When looking at the MSDS (Material Safety Data Sheet) for BHT they found the following:

• Do NOT let this chemical enter the environment.
• Combustible.
• Ingestion causes Abdominal pain. Confusion. Dizziness. Nausea. Vomiting.
• The substance may have effects on the liver.
• The substance is harmful to aquatic organisms.

That is certainly concerning when we have it in our food and in our cosmetics!
The FDA have approved BHT for use in food, so it comes down to us to check ingredients.  And not surprising BHT is found in both kids favorite bright colored and fruity cereals to what are seemingly healthy adult cereals that look like a healthy alternative even saying, non-GMO, organic, healthy...... until you read the ingredients and find BHT as the preservative.
My kids hate going grocery shopping with me because when they want to pick out a new cereal we HAVE to read the box and look for BHT.  They know those 3 little letters mean a hard NO.  It's very disappointing!  For me too!  I have had to stop using one of my favorite shower gel and lotion combos from a leading bath and body store because their signature line contains BHT as a preservative.  This broke my heart!  I have to be extremely careful and read the teeny tiny list of ingredients for the items that don't have BHT.  It sucks.
But think about it.  Our skin is our biggest organ right?  Well if you are rubbing lotion into your skin every day or even a few times a week over the course of years, plus eating small to medium doses of BHT every day don't you think your chances of cancer would be elevated?  The correct answer is Yes.
For most of us cancer patients and survivors we are told our cancer is environmental, meaning the doctor's don't have one trigger point for it and as Americans there is so much fake, chemical crap in EVERYTHING that it is only a matter of time before our DNA is broken down and cancer can either be triggered or grow.

My advice.... don't be a blind shopper or consumer.  READ your products, make educated healthier choices.  You only have one life to live so make the most of it!